Letting Go-The Fear and the Fun

The Santa Fe Studio Tour is in full swing, and I will be open this weekend as well. During the event I get to meet with many longtime friends and collectors as well as meeting new ones. I only get to participate every other year because of my travel workshop schedule, so the next time will be in 2025. The questions I get asked the most are about my process and the amount of time it takes to create the work. I also get asked about where my inspiration comes from and what it is like to have synesthesia, a crossing of the senses.

I love touchable textures and incredible depth in my work. I create layers upon layers using transparent collage layers, acrylic gels and crackles along with collage and transfers. Here is the thing, in order to create layers, you must cover something up. That is where the fear comes in. What do I cover up? I don’t want to cover it up, but it isn’t working like it is. I learned in art school that if you are working around a “precious part” of your work, it is never going to feel integrated. I will often encourage a student who is struggling with fixing an area to just cover it up with some white paint and integrate it into the rest of the work.

This is where the fun comes in. Once you have taken the leap and covered up the part that isn’t contributing, you have the freedom to have fun and see where the next step takes you. The angst is caused by not trusting what you know and feel to be true. You are attached to something that spoke to you or someone pointed out that they loved it, but now it doesn’t feel right. Trust that and save yourself some time. I still can become attached to a section. But what happens if you mess it up even worse? I know that if I don’t care for a layer I have added, I can still integrate it and keep layering. The next layer will let a little of the angst show through and brighten the next layer.

Someone once asked why I paint something if I am just going to cover it up. I don’t begin with that idea, it is like life, it evolves and changes. The more I paint, the more I learn to trust the process. I let go of the fear of messing something up. I take more chances. I become more experimental and less attached to the outcome because I know I can integrate it into the work with the next layer. Just like life has moments of darkness and struggle, so do my paintings. It is the contrast that brings out the composition and the layers. My life wouldn’t be the same without the mistakes I have made. They influence the next choice I make.

The other question about time is not really important. I think people ask that because in our society we equate time with money. I use an answer that Picasso used when asked how long it took him to do a little sketch. He said 15 minutes and 45 years. Every step over the years goes into the creation of even the smallest painting.

Inspiration comes from everything around me from nature, music, sounds of the ocean, to ideas and concepts in physics, women’s rights and ancient history and galactic journeys. They may come together in a process of switching between listening, seeing and movement. The senses will reinterpret through different channels. Music becomes colors and dance inspires composition. Ideas can prompt a whole new series of shapes and materials.

As I get older, I find myself letting go of expectations and having more fun in my process. Life is good. Come join me on an art adventure. It will change your life, at least a layer of it.