Self-Talk for Transformation

We are now over a week into the new year and some of the shiny sparkle is already dimming. Do you have high expectations for the new year? Do you do a reset? Intentions have replaced resolutions, but how can you make the intentions last and what are the steps to manifest them? What is the biggest roadblock that holds you back? Do you want some definitive steps to take to keep you on track? Let’s jump into the journey.

The toughest critic and the biggest barrier you will ever encounter is inside your mind. This is the negative self-talk that goes on, sometimes even playing continuously like a radio in the background. Changing the channel is one step to practice, but actually listening to what the voice has to say can be a more long lasting and effective way to turn off the negative self-chatter. You might think that is counter intuitive but just like a 4-year-old pulling on your shirt while you are talking to someone, they will not be silenced if you ignore them. You try to continue your conversation and ignore the interruption, but they persist. If you take a moment to listen and redirect or answer, most likely they will settle down. The same can be said about the constant negative chatter.

I am in the studio working and my nagging critic pops up with something like you can’t do that or, it isn’t any good. No one wants to see that or, blah, blah, blah. This is not constructive feedback. These are old messages that are overwritten in your current life. Stop and say to this old message, that you will not listen to negative chatter. If they have constructive feedback, then ok, but otherwise hit the mute button. Grab a remote or draw a circle on your worktable and write mute in the middle. When the old critic comes back with the same message, say to it again, if you have some constructive criticism I will listen, otherwise hit the mute button. This will train your mind to be aware of any helpful feedback that may come through and filter or mute the old messages. I have found nuggets of good information regarding a part of a painting buried within the negative chatter. If I just ignored it all I would have missed something helpful. Practicing this mindful listening will help in other areas as well.

Life as an artist can be a dizzying ride. Some days you are floating on top and with a few words someone or something can pop your balloon and you come plunging down. I have days like this, everyone does, no matter what level of experience you have. It isn’t imposter syndrome, just the doubts that can pop up with the sensitive creative life of an artist. The other day I had a negative comment on a video. The person took the time to tell me that it was a waste of time to watch it. Yep, go figure. I was sad, but I looked at other comments on the same video and more people were thankful for it. The same day another person commented on a painting post that she loved it and to never stop painting. No wonder my head was spinning. I know better than to let these things get to me, but really, I am just getting through my life like everyone else.

Here is the trick to help you when things go spinning and to prevent this from becoming a roadblock. I keep track of the best things people have told me. Just copy and paste a few of the most supportive words you have received. It doesn’t have to be an extensive list, just enough to remind you that yes, you are doing a great job, and you are on the path you love. When the negative voices, either internally or outside get to be too much, pull up your list and bask in the warmth of support. You will feel like getting back to work with a smile on your face.

Here is a new practice I am instituting this year; it is called new moon intentions. Every new moon write an intention for the cycle. This will keep you clear and focused on the intentions you set this new year. Today is a new moon and you can begin today. I found a nice little box that wasn’t being used. It even had two compartments inside. I cut up enough pieces of paper for all 13 new moons this year and put them on one side. I wrote my intention for the new moon and put it on the other side. At the end of the year, I will pull them out and have a look and see where I went.

Lotsa love and hugs.